Hi Beautiful people,
I just wanted to touch on the topic of how IMPORTANT it is to have supportive people around you in any situation, not just grief.
As we are all aware, we are still very unsure of when we will be out of quarantine.
Over the last few weeks I have felt very antisocial and have been restricting my phone usage.
Turning off my phone notifications and avoiding social media as much as I can just to limit what information my mind is processing.
Everything from the posts you see online, to the music you listen to can affect you in ways you may not realise.
Take a day and analyse your life.
Look into what you have been watching, listening to, reading and who you have been around. You may find some answers for the reasons of the emotions you are going through.
During this time, I have received missed calls and had not responded to a lot of messages from friends and family.
Physically, I wanted to reply back to messages but mentally I could not as I mentioned in the previous blog, there are days when you literally do not know how you feel so how are you meant to communicate something you don’t know to others?
Today was that day that I replied to messages and I had a lovely reminder from a close friend.
“People deep down should understand that you will need your space and time to grieve, if those people do not understand then you may need to re-evaluate your friendships.
If a friend genuinely cares for you and your wellbeing, when you do finally reply to their message, it should be nothing but love again.”
This was such a beautiful reminder that I really needed today as during my time away from my phone, I was feeling a sense of guilt that I was not responding to messages and I was having moments where I wondered if anyone would still be around if I didn’t reply to their message within days, weeks or even months.
It is important to remember that you HAVE to and NEED to do whatever you want to, to go through this journey of Grief.
The people who will want to understand you or want to support you, will.
Sadly, there is nothing you can do to make people stay around you. This journey will be an ultimate rollercoaster, there will be days when you start to feel better and will be up and available to do all things possible and then there will be days when you might take 5 steps back and not want to be around anyone.
This can be too much for some people to deal with or they simply just don’t know how to be or act around you but just remember to put yourself first at all times and make sure that you are gentle with yourself.
Be very mindful of the energy you allow into your life especially during such vulnerable times.
I will write the next blog on “Why we lose friends after a loved one dies?” and I will be doing an instagram discussion on it on our page @TheGriefPad so you can all voice your opinions and share your experiences.
Stay safe everyone!
Love, Kyra xxx